Daily Life, Government

Is Privacy Important?

If you’ve been following along at home, I recently went on a conspiracy theory reading binge (is it still conspiracy if it’s true?). But that’s nothing new as I’ve been espousing about our security state for quite some time now. Lately it seems like daily you find out something new that either the government or big tech is doing to spy on you. 99% of us just shrug our shoulders. Meh, it’s the price of having the fancy new iPhone so we can FaceTime and share all our data between devices via the cloud, right?

This morning I listened to an interview with Erik Prince, the founder of the Blackwater private security company. Fascinating guy for many reasons, but one of them is that he’s just recently created a smart phone that’s “unplugged”. In theory it can’t be traced by the government and it allows you to use most common apps without the tech companies (or government) scooping up all your usage and location data. While we probably all have a sense of what’s happening, it’s still shocking to hear the degree of spying that’s being done on us via our phones.

As is usually the case when I see or hear things like this I immediately vow to get off all social media platforms, wipe everything off my phone, and switch to using cash for all transactions. But then the more I think about it I realize “they” already have everything there is to know about me. I’m sure I have a very well established profile filed away somewhere. So what good would unplugging do at this point? If, as Mr Prince alleges (and I believe to be true), multiple apps, Google, and Apple can turn on/off your phone camera and microphone at will… and that data is recorded and stored for all eternity, then a hostile actor could already blackmail, embarrass, or threaten me. What good would shutting it off now do?

I suppose the only reason to have an unplugged phone would be if I planned on someday communicating with others or researching things that the government would like to know about and track. I don’t see that happening. I guess it’s accepting the “if you’re not doing anything wrong, you have nothing to fear” mentality. It would take effort and sacrifice to try and unplug from our tech overlords. Is it really worth it?

But here’s the thing – it makes me mad that we even have to contemplate this. How did we let this happen? As Mr Prince says, it’s the frog in the slowly boiling water phenomenon. Little by little, with promises about how cool it will be when every device in your world is interconnected. I’m just as guilty as everyone else. I have Alexa, Siri, a smart refrigerator, online cameras and heating systems. On top of everything else that our phones do, I share my location online for Mrs Troutdog when riding the motorcycle and happily post photos everywhere I go embedded with location data. Like I said, I bought into the whole interconnected thing. Hell, I even worked for the evil empire (Microsoft back when Google’s slogan was still “don’t be evil“) and was part of their data collection division via your TV and set top box way back in the day. We collected everything about your viewing habits – what channels you watched, how long, and how you surfed through the guide. All so we could sell that data to advertisers. Well, technically not us but the cable providers who used our system. So I suppose I was part of the problem way back then.

But now… now the genie is out of the box and I’m not sure we’ll be able to put it back. The Borg has metastasized and has grown out of control. I don’t think the vast majority of people grasp the fact that we live in a full on police/security state. Monitored at all times. What our government and the tech companies currently do would be the envy of the old East German Stasi. Take a close look at how China monitors and controls its population, because that is our future very soon.

It makes me angry that we gave up everything for the convenience of some fancy tech and the promise of keeping us secure from terrorists and stopping the drug cartels. We did it to ourselves and there’s no going back – without drastic measures. I’m not sure we have the will as a nation to push back anymore.

The funny thing is that just the other day I agreed with Mrs Troutdog that I’d fully switch over to the Apple ecosystem and get an iPhone so we could more easily share calendars and FaceTime. Now I’m not so sure I want to. Maybe I should get an unplugged phone and start purging all the data collection apps and social media I use. Maybe I should start using cash for everything so my purchase habits and locations can’t be tracked.

Maybe.

But then again, that’s inconvenient. And I like fancy new technology. Besides, I’m not doing anything wrong. At the end of the day why do I care if someone’s watching me?

Man I hate being a lazy conspiracy theorist.

Cool, Daily Life

It’s Just A Haircut

I finally couldn’t take it anymore. The end of a long hair experiment. Back to the life of a normie old guy. I got a haircut yesterday. It made me a little sad. Cutting my hair was confirmation that I will never be the cool surfer guy I always wanted to be. Now I look just like every other late middle aged dude. The only thing missing is a fanny pack and white New Balance sneakers.

I suppose I should be grateful that I still have plenty of hair on my head. Haven’t lost any of it. And thanks to my maternal grandfather, almost no grey yet. Hair is a funny thing. Speaking only for dudes, you either have good hair or you don’t. There is no in-between. Somewhere towards the end of high school, guys tend to have established their “haircut”. For most men that never changes – at least until they become follicle challenged and have to commit to the comb over, Rogaine, or simply shaving it.

I don’t know why, but I never figured out my standard haircut. It’s literally different every time. There’s been mullets, crew cuts, flat tops, longer, shorter, you name it I’ve had it. I’m sure I’m the worst sort of customer for stylists/barbers. When they ask, “what are we doing today?”, I go into a rambling “I don’t know, maybe shorter here, I don’t remember the clipper size, I guess above the ears, what do you think would look good?” answer.

How is it possible I’m a grown-ass, old guy and I still don’t know what my standard haircut is?

Anyway, this last go ’round I got it into my head that I wanted long hair. I figured at least while I still have hair why not let it grow? I may or may not have had some sort of Brad Pitt look from Legends of the Fall in my mind. So I let it grow. And grow. For a while I liked it. I felt like maybe it made me look a bit younger. Maybe a little bit of a biker vibe going on. It was different, not the standard white guy haircut that everyone else has. Next, a mustache appeared. Now I really did have some sort of free spirit, ski bum, adventure guy thing happening. I briefly thought I looked cool.

And then the hair started becoming a pain in the butt. It was in my face. It got in my eyes when I wore a motorcycle or bike helmet. I started wearing a ball cap every day rather than deal with it. It wasn’t quite ponytail material, but we weren’t that far off. I was stuck in the dreaded in-between stage. Not long enough to pull back out of the way, too long to be manageable every day.

I normally just go to whatever barber is closest and available – which is probably not someone who’s going to be able to help me figure out a style. Mrs Troutdog offered to find someone at her hair salon who can work on longer mens hair. That’s when I started thinking that this simply wasn’t worth it anymore. I am no fashion icon. Regular appointments at a “hair salon” just isn’t who I am. And then Mrs Troutdog issued the final blow when she told me the mustache wasn’t working for her. I was crushed. My dreams of being the cool surfer, skier, biker dude vanished at that moment.

I shaved my face. It looks naked and pudgy. The next day I went to the closest Supercuts and told the gal (who happened to be a trainee) to shave it all off. I think she asked me three or four times is that really what I wanted, before she started in the with clippers. Like the biblical figure Samson, I felt my superpowers drifting away with every snip of the scissors. And just like that, I was back to my regular look. Hair that’s sort of cowlicky, sticking up in random places that I try to contain with whatever hair goop I happen to have on hand. The standard look of the middle aged male.

I’ll admit it’s easier this way. I can wear a hat without hair sticking out in every direction. It’s not going to get in my eyes when I’m riding the bike. I don’t have to live in fear of wind. I don’t have to take a shower or put on a hat just to run to the corner store in the morning. But deep down, I kind of miss it. But reality is that I don’t look like Brad Pitt, with or without the hair. I’m sure I looked ridiculous. But for a brief moment, the longer hair made me feel a little bit cooler than I really am.

Well, c’est la vie, that’s life. It’s only hair. Fortunately for me, it grows back. Maybe someday I’ll try it again.

I did notice that we have a new high-end mens barber down the street. Maybe I can drift into some sort of a shaved viking warrior cut?

Daily Life, woke

Do Men Need Adventure?

Every once in a while I stumble across writing that makes me go wow. This essay, Pixel Valhalla, is one of those. Good writing is an art and I envy people who can do it. For me, when I have an idea or a thought, it’s something that’s a blurry figure off in the distance. I know what it is, but I struggle to bring it close. I try to get it into focus, but most of the time I end up simply writing around it. I get my point across, but it’s not clean. I rarely capture exactly what I was thinking. The author of Pixel Valhalla provides a perfect thesis for why the western world is driving itself off a cliff and I’m jealous of his writing.

There are many threads woven throughout the essay but one really struck me, as it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately – like it or not, men are genetically engineered to hunt, kill, wage war, and travel in search of adventure and the spoils of conquest. You can deny it if you’d like, but history tells the truth. It’s in our DNA. The need for adventure is in our genes. And it’s being bred out of us.

Broadly speaking, the Generation Z and Alpha kids have completely lost the spirit of adventure. They have no interest in getting drivers licenses. They don’t care about exploring. At 14 I took the bus, alone, 500 miles to spend the summer working. At 17 I was driving into Mexico to sleep on the beach and surf. A 17 year old today at most might jump in a car, that was given to them by their parents, and drive to In-N-Out or Top Golf to take Instagram photos. They can’t read a map, navigate, or function without their electronic devices. Their world is one of prepackaged experiences, curated by digital reviews, and above all – safe.

Unlike my generation, Gen Z’s wouldn’t dream of jumping in a car of questionable reliability and driving cross-country in a world where your only form of communication was a pay phone outside a sketchy looking diner. A world where finding your next freeway exit was done by trying not to drive off the road as you looked at a badly folded AAA map spread out on your lap. My nephew is returning from college in the midwest shortly. He has a car. When I suggest he should drive back by himself, everyone looks at me like I’m asking him to walk through a Taliban-controlled city in Afghanistan at night. Mom and dad are flying out so they can drive him home. Our generations are not the same.

Meanwhile, just the other day it was announced that the term “boy” will be removed from the “Boy Scouts”. While the scouts were neutered years ago, this change echos where we are as a society. Men are no longer allowed to form groups and have the bonding rituals that the male species have required since the beginning of time. Taking away the notions of duty, honor, adventure, and self-reliance young boys develop in groups like the scouts (of old days), robs them of what it is to be a male. It strips them of the future desire to explore and take risks in life. I don’t think the feminization of men will end well for our society.

I know this is shocking to the current societal mindset, but men and women are not the same. We each bring a different set of DNA to the table. And a well functioning society needs those differences, working together, to thrive. No I’m not suggesting we go back to the 1800’s or some dystopian handmaidens tale world. I am suggesting that suppressing the male desire for adventure and self reliance is harmful to a society in the long term.

Our birth rate is falling off a cliff, the concept of a nuclear family is quaint, and the woke ideology rules the public discourse. The kids of today would rather be gaming or staring at Tik Tok on their phones instead of taking a road trip somewhere. It’s not their fault. It’s the world they grew up in. Football was too dangerous to play. Mom drove you to school and picked you up. Instead of being forced to go outside and make up your own fun, kids are shuttled to a never ending series of engineered playdates and art camp. Spontaneously meeting up with the other kids in the neighborhood to play flag football, baseball, and run around in the mud building forts is a thing of the past.

I suppose this would all be fine in some sort of utopian science fiction world of the future. But we don’t live in that world. Our society is becoming weak. It’s collapsing under the weight of a woke, liberal ideology. And the wolves are circling.

Is it too late to change course? Probably. Something catastrophic would have to happen to force men to become self reliant again. If you believe in the concept the Fourth Turning, it’s going to happen. Weak societies don’t survive. That’s not politically correct to say today, but history has shown it to be true time and time again. Hopefully, it’s after my time. I don’t envy my nieces and nephews. I suspect they have turbulent times ahead of them, and we haven’t prepared them for what’s coming. Keeping them safe and isolated didn’t do them any favors.

So the message is, find a way to encourage the young men in your life to have adventures. We’d be much better off with a generation of young men eager to jump in the longboat and sail across the ocean looking for exploration and conquest. Men who travel to the plains to see the buffalo before they’re gone. Men who aspire to Valhalla more than achieving the high score on a video game. Our future may depend on this more than you think.

“You should move to a small town, somewhere the rule of law still exists. You will not survive here. You are not a wolf, and this is a land of wolves now.” -Alejandro “Sicario”

Government

They’re Watching

I spent the last week on a beach outside of the USA. Good food, too many margaritas, and plenty of time by the pool. With nothing but time on my hands I consumed a number of books. One was about the United States biometric data collection practices and another was Edward Snowdens book. Both were fascinating and frightening. The allegations Snowden makes about US surveillance capabilities almost seem made up… and then we experienced it firsthand crossing back across the border.

Mrs Troutdog and I both enrolled in the Global Entry program so we wouldn’t have to stand in the passport line coming back from vacation. This trip was our first time using it. We walked up to a handful of empty kiosks and a customs agent. He instructed us to look into a camera. In under five seconds a green light came on and we were done and on our way. Instant facial recognition indexed against a database of god knows what information about us. (also used by the Clear airport security program) It was creepy, especially knowing that this technology is probably being used on us daily as we walk around minding our own business.

If you weren’t aware, the NSA/CIA/DIA invested heavily in biometric harvesting and analysis during the global war on terror, primarily in Afghanistan. One of the offshoots of that is a company called Palantir founded by billionaire Peter Thiel. They created AI that takes biometrics and metadata, indexes that against intelligence data, and creates predictive behavior models – basically tracking your movements and predicting that you’re very likely to plant an IED or attack soldiers in the future. That battlefield program has now been turned over to police departments under the auspices of “predictive policing”. A number of big departments, LA, New York, New Orleans, have been experimenting with it to target gang activity. It’s unclear at this point to what degree it’s been implemented beyond trials.

Another fun company, also funded by Peter Thiel, is Clearview AI. They’ve scraped billions upon billions of images from Facebook and other social media sites to build a massive neural network of facial and location recognition. Give the algorithm a face and it will spit back all known locations that person visited and their associates/friends. It’s currently being used by law enforcement and private companies. Wonder why you didn’t get that job? Maybe one of your friends is too controversial. Maybe they know you visited that seedy massage parlor or attended a protest of some sort several years ago.

But where does the government get this data about you? Besides companies like Clearview AI, thanks to Mr Snowden we now know that the NSA is intercepting all internet traffic. There is a series of servers sitting at all major US telecom sites that internet traffic is routed through. The first is called TURMOIL and it intercepts your web request and makes a copy. The second is called TURBINE which parses through your data looking for keywords, metadata, and flagged web sites. If you trip the algorithm, the TURBINE server can insert malware which is then downloaded to your device and voila, the NSA is now actively monitoring you.

The NSA and CIA are monitoring and collecting every single bit of data you produce and storing it at a massive data center south of Salt Lake City (reportedly capable of storing yottabytes of data). Internet searches, phone calls, location data… basically anything that makes contact electronically with the outside world is harvested. Add on top of that facial recognition data and license plate readers from a sea of cameras planted throughout your city and it’s fair to say you are being tracked and monitored most of your waking moments. All in the name of “security”.

Going into Snowdens book, I wasn’t sure how I felt. I love my country and after 9/11, of course I want to ensure the terror tactics seen in Europe or on the battlefield don’t spread here. Snowden signed the NDA’s and swore an oath – you don’t then get to just violate that because you think you’re being righteous.

The problem is that our country lied. James Clapper, director of national Intelligence, sat in front of congress and swore we did not collect data on Americans. But they do. They collect all of it. Everything. The justification they now give is that they collect and store it, but they don’t use it unless there’s a reason. Uhm, yeah right.

When you see the overreach and abuses we’re currently witnessing from the FBI, the weaponization of the DOJ, the illegal FISA searches, NSA monitoring and leaking info about journalists, and the alphabet agencies partnering with social media to censor news… my trust level for the government is about as close to zero as you can get. So as far as Snowden goes, I went from ambivalent to firmly on team Snowden.

We have a minor little thing called the fourth amendment in this country. The government does not have the right to spy and collect data about you without due process. The people have the right to understand what information is being harvested about them and how it’s used.

While the founding fathers may appreciate that pithy little paragraph, it’s meaningless. We’ve already crossed the point of no return. This genie isn’t going back in the bottle. We officially live in a big brother state. You are going to be watched, monitored, and have predictive AI make decisions about your life from the moment of birth until your death. It’s Orwellian stuff of science fiction novels. It’s all fine and dandy I suppose, as long as it’s used against bad guys. But what’s that old quote? “Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely“

It wouldn’t take much for an administration to decide some segment of the population was getting a bit too subversive and to take action. Write the wrong thing in a blog post, say something about the government in your living room with Alexa listening, order a flagged item from Amazon – you’re going to get a knock on your door from the feds. Good luck booking airline travel or applying for a job when you’re on an enhanced watch list.

Can you honestly say we’re very far away from that reality? What makes you think we’re not already there?

So yeah, I approve of what Snowden did. We need more of that. More sunlight. More details. More exposure. Because I like quotes, here’s another one for you: “An educated citizenry is a vital requisite for our survival as a free people.” Those in power do not want this and will fight it tooth and nail, in the name of security. Understand this and reject any and all attempts to expand the security state.

Now excuse me, I’m off to feed the Facebook algorithm false information to confuse the feds. Just kidding. I watch cute Vizsla videos and mountain bike crashes.

Or that’s what I want you to think.

Daily Life, Health

I’d Like To Buy Some Discipline Please

I went mountain biking with my crazy fit neighbor yesterday. Crazy fit meaning – he went for a trail run and then did leg day at the gym before we went for our ride. Halfway through the ride we joined up with another guy who turned out to be a pretty good rider. I was left in the back desperately gasping for air while they laughed and carried on a normal conversation. Granted they’re twenty years younger than me, but still… I hated that feeling. Being the slow guy who’s holding everyone up.

It’s a very painful feeling because once upon a time, I was the guy in front. I was the guy first up a climb. I was the guy offering encouraging words to other riders. I was the guy bombing down the hill at ludicrous speeds. I was the guy who was a “cyclist”. Now I’m the guy apologizing to other riders and telling them not to wait for me. It hurts.

How I got here is not a mystery. A love of tacos, nachos, and adult beverages. I stopped moving. I like napping more than the gym. I also know how to fix it. The problem is that I just… don’t. And I don’t know why.

Well, that’s not true. I do know why. It’s discipline. Specifically, a lack of.

My crazy fit neighbor and I had a conversation about this while riding. He’s recently semi-retired and has an amazing amount of structure to his day. Up at the same time each morning. Trail run at 06:30. Breakfast with the family at 10. Gym workout at 11:30. Mandatory two hour outside adventure with the kids each day. Bike ride or hike for an hour or so late afternoon. Dinner, then family/kid time. Early to bed. Every day, without fail. He’s dropped twenty pounds over the winter and is the fittest he’s ever been. He says the discipline has become addictive and has made him super productive with everything in his life.

My goal is to get out of my sweatpants by 10.

I don’t know why I can’t seem to find the mojo these days. But I will say, riding with those guys yesterday helped. On my own I would have done a shorter, easier route. Being with others and peer pressure helps with motivation. When they asked where I wanted to go and I picked the longer, harder trail. Although I nearly burst my spleen from exertion while climbing, I did not have to stop or walk up the hill. When I got to the top and they gave me fist bumps for my effort, I resolved right there that I never want this feeling again.

I’m going to do what it takes to no longer be the slowest guy in the group. Like putting a picture of yourself in a bathing suit on the fridge to remind yourself not to snack… I got to see just how slow and out of shape I really am. This will not be tolerated any longer. I don’t know if 0630 trail runs are going to happen, but the drift and time wasting stops today.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go ride my bike.

Government, Politics

What Comes Next?

I’ll admit, I’m a little worried at the current state of world affairs. My unease was made worse by a book I just finished. It’s called “Nuclear War: A Scenario” by investigative reporter Annie Jacobsen. I highly recommend it. It describes step by step exactly what happens in a nuclear exchange, from how the nuclear football works, to what the blast damage looks like. The TLDR is… your best bet is to be at ground zero and have it all over instantly. Anything else is just prolonged suffering. Nobody wins.

My bigger takeaway from the book is how fragile the entire system is. It’s truly frightening how little of a misjudgment it would take to kick the whole thing off. If we (or Russia or China) detect what we think is a nuclear warhead being launched, the president has six minutes to decide what to do. SIX MINUTES. And when you look at the shuffling dementia patient who currently holds the keys… I’m not filled with confidence at the decision making ability.

Now fast forward to today. Iran launched a massive strike against Israel. Fortunately all except seven of the missiles and drones were shot down. But now we face the million dollar question – now what?

Was this just stupid chest thumping by Iran so they can reclaim their manhood after their general was liquified by an Israeli missile in retaliation for Oct 7? It sort of looks like that since what they launched was old, slow, and we’ve known it was coming for a week now. If that was the case, shouldn’t both sides simply retreat back to their corners and maintain the status quo? Is it worth kicking off a full scale regional war that has the potential of escalating to something much worse?

But what if it was something else? What if it was a probe to judge the response? The US/UK/Israel basically just showed Iran (and anyone else watching) exactly what our response times are, how we respond, where each defensive launch point is, and how effective the anti-missile defense is. How many more iron dome and arrow missiles do we and Israel have remaining? Seems like a worthwhile exercise to go through if you don’t fear any real retaliation.

Let’s be real. The goal is to drive the Jews into the sea. Always has been, always will. The players may change, but the desire to eradicate Israel never ends. There is no amount of appeasement that is going to fix this. October 7th was a stark reminder. The moment Israel lets its guard down, even for a moment, the invading hoards will swarm intent on massacre. You know it, and I know it. If Iran thinks it can get away with an even bigger strike with minimal consequences, they’ll do it and you know it to be true. So what do we do?

My gut says it’s time to have a joint US/UK/Israel strike against Iran to completely devastate their infrastructure and economy. Ensure their nuclear weapon development programs are destroyed. Make sure they have zero economic power. It’s not like they’re going to hate us any more than they already do. While we’re at it, let’s wrest control back of the Red Sea shipping lanes. Oh, and how about we put some pressure on our “allies” like Qatar to stop harboring Hamas leadership? Help Israel finish cleaning out Hamas and start building bigger and better walls around Gaza and the West Bank. While we’re at it, southern Lebanon and Hezbollah should probably get a taste of real retribution. No more firing rockets into civilian homes with impunity.

Sometimes, a good ass kicking is the only way to stop a bully.

All fine and dandy, except… I’m not sure we can put that genie back in the bottle once it’s out. And color me skeptical, but I have zero faith in our “leaders” to make good decisions. Would Russia step in? Would China take this opportunity to take Taiwan? Do we really want to be mired in another forever war in the Middle East? What a mess.

It’s clear that our “experts”, both past and present, pretty much don’t know doodly-squat. Their ability to predict outcomes and consequences leave much to be desired. Like I said in the beginning, it wouldn’t take much for things to go horribly wrong. After all, WWI was started after some archduke was assassinated. The wrong missile flys over the wrong airspace and… boom. The end.

It’s a sobering thought. It’s a very scary time. Do we encourage everyone to step back, or do we go thump some heads before things get worse? Glad I’m not making the decisions. I just wish I had more faith in those who are.

Elections have consequences.

Cool, Daily Life

Weekend Random Thoughts

It’s the weekend people, whoop, whoop! Actually, everyday is a weekend for me. No I take that back – I sort of have the opposite schedule. Monday through Friday is when I prefer to do things. Weekends I hibernate in the house to avoid the weekend crowds. Although with Covid and the ensuing work-from-home onslaught, weekdays are getting just as crowded as weekends. All you people need to go back to the office! Anyway, I haven’t done this in a while so here’s some random thoughts for you:

  • We went to an in-person movie last night for the first time in… four years probably. We slowly stopped going because every movie being made is/was superhero, Marvel, or remakes of something. We’d go through the listings and not be able to find anything that wasn’t going to subtract brain cells. Then Covid hit and, well, we never went back. So last night was my first experience in one of the fancy theaters with the reclining (and shaking/vibrating) seats. Pretty cool. Unfortunately every single trailer was a hard no. Why can’t Hollywood get back to original scripts?
  • The movie we chose to go see was Dune, Part 2. Since we hadn’t seen Part 1 we had to binge that at home beforehand. Both were interesting. A little hard to follow if you know nothing about Dune. long, but never dragged.
  • The ski season went from piss-poor to never ending. Our local resort got another foot overnight. Crazy for early April.
  • Speaking of snow, my new flip flops just arrived yesterday. Ready for Spring.
  • I have a probable neuroma on the bottom of my foot. It’s a little ball of scar tissue that presses on the nerve in-between the toes. Imagine a scalding hot nail pressing up through your foot. I’ve been dealing with it for several years now. I’ve tried everything – natural toe box shoes, barefoot time, toe spacers, neuroma pads, toe stretching bands. Maybe a tiny bit of relief, but not much. I finally broke down and scheduled an appointment with a doc. Unfortunately, if this is really what it is, there’s not much you can do. Cortisone shots are a first attempt. Last option is surgery to cut the nerve. Sigh. Maybe there’s a new miracle treatment out there now.
  • Going on my first overnight motorcycle camping trip of the year in two weeks. I’m actually a little nervous. A few weeks ago, I rode for the first time since winter started and it was like I’d never seen a motorcycle before. The weather needs to improve quickly so I can get some practice time in.
  • I went down a rabbit hole watching how-to videos on making videos look more cinematic. I then went back and rewatched a bunch of the videos I’ve made and realized they all look like an eighth grader got a hold of a camcorder for the first time. It’s hard to explain. You watch a well done YouTube video and it looks simple and effortless. In my head that’s what I’m doing but it never actually comes out that way. I need to practice and figure this out.
  • I’ve grown tired of my music playlist. As I’m blasting it the garage gym, I find myself skipping four or five songs for every one I let play. I probably just need to sit down and spend a day curating my music, but that seems like work. I wonder if you can pay someone to do that for you?
  • The new status symbol is to have a podcast. At this point, who doesn’t have a podcast? I’d have a podcast expect for that whole, you know, talking to people thing.
  • Is it just me, or has the quality of meat just plummeted? We subscribed for quite a few years to a meat delivery service (Butcher Box). Finally got rid of it because the quality got so bad. We just bought a quarter cow and even that is just meh. The price per pound of prime beef, even at Costco, has gotten crazy. Thanks Bidenomics. At this rate we will have to eat the WEF bugs soon.
  • I’ve gotten old enough that my first nephew is graduating college. I don’t envy him trying to enter the job market now.
  • I went on the first mountain bike ride of the season the other day with my crazy fit neighbor. My legs still hurt. He took pity on me and went running for a few hours before we rode because he knew we’d be going slower (ouch, that stung the ego a bit).
  • In running, cycling, and hiking there’s something called a Fuck You break. The stronger fastest people get to the top first and get a nice long break. As soon as the slowest person gets to the top, everyone takes off again. Those who need the break the least, get the most. I was always the one at the top first. Now, I’m the recipient of the FU break. This pisses me off. This injustice will not stand.
  • We head to Mexico in three weeks. I was planning on being in speedo shape, but oddly enough that didn’t happen. Oh well, taco and tequila tasting tours it is.

Ok, that’s enough for now. Any longer and I’ll bust into discussions of politics or religion. I’m staring out at the snow and puddles of mud wondering what to do today. Maybe I’ll go experiment with video. Or a picture walkabout. Hmm. Maybe today will be the music playlist day. Or maybe a nap. Anything to avoid cleaning out the basement.

Peace out, and go practice your Contrarianism (TM).

Government, Politics

The Adults Are Back In Charge

The level of incompetence found in this administration is breathtaking. Or it’s calculated evil. I can’t decide which. Before you start shouting about the Illuminati partnering with the WEF to create a new global world order… it’s not. This is a case of snotty, condescending, east coast elites who all went to the best Ivy League schools and are sure they’re the smartest kids in the class. Suddenly they find themselves in power and discover that the cockamamie ideas they bantered about in their dorm rooms when they were making fun of Dan Quayle spelling potato, aren’t working in real life. But just like Disney, rather than admit they were wrong, they decide to double down. And that scares the hell out of me.

Yesterday Secretary of State Antony Blinken reaffirmed that Ukraine will join NATO. National security advisor Jake Sullivan said the same thing last July. So not only are we doing everything humanly possible to prolong the war in Ukraine, we’ve decided that our foreign policy objective is to cross the red line that Putin specifically declared as a path to war. Why?

Why do we continue to push a war that Ukraine has no chance of winning? None. Zero. If you disagree, please explain how Ukraine is going to defeat the entire Russian army – and not just defeat them, but destroy them to the point that Russia will pull back to the original border and Putin will simply apologize and promise to never do it again. Do you really, honestly, think that’s going to happen? Of course not and you know it. So what exactly then is our objective?

At some point, Putin will tire of the stalemate and choose to take decisive action. And then what do we do? This brinksmanship is beyond frightening because of how fast it could escalate to something really bad. Meanwhile, we’re going to vote to send Ukraine another 60 billion dollars (that we don’t have) next week. And, as confirmed by representative Massie, not a single congressperson nor the state department even has the slightest idea how many Ukrainians have been killed in this war. It’s disgusting.

The disastrous Afghanistan withdrawal. The unintended consequences of the open border. Loss of the strategic petroleum reserve. Near total depletion of our military ammunition stockpiles. Nord Stream. China spy balloons. The fragile beginnings of Middle East peace are gone. Iran. Threatening Israel while Hamas still holds US hostages. Red Sea shipping shut down by the Houthis. The hits just keep on coming.

I’m not sure I can come up with anything that looks like foreign police success for this administration. It’s pretty bad when your track record is literally zero after almost four years. At this point, I think you could randomly pick people out of the phone book and they’d do a better job. This administration, and the “deep state” for that matter, has become the living embodiment of the Peter Principle – “people in a hierarchy tend to rise to a level of respective incompetence”. We’re living with a governmental bureaucracy ushered in by the Obama administration. Flotillas of idealistic “hope and change” Ivy League college kids who went straight from school to the Washington machine without any real world experience. Now years later, they’ve risen to the top and are leading us to disaster. At this point I think I’d prefer the evil Klaus Schwab Illuminati scenario – at least it’s explainable.

As Obama famously said, “elections have consequences”. He was more right than he could have imagined. We need to take the sharp objects away from the “adults in charge” soon, before things go really bad.

Daily Life, Health

How Old Are You?

Age is one of those things you can’t escape. Like the slow drift of the continental plates, it’s going to happen whether you want it to or not. It was one of the things that fascinated me as an RN. To see a consistent population of people, usually in their 60’s-70’s, who manifested their apparent age wildly different. A 70 year old who still rides bikes would be in the room next to a 60 year old who looked 90. Why such a difference? Why do people age at such different rates? I got to thinking about this because I’m currently reading a book on evolutionary anthropology (don’t ask) and was very intrigued when I ran across this quote:

“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you was?”

Leroy Satchel Paige

Unless you were born into the Hadza tribe in Africa or maybe grew up in some weird religious cult that didn’t celebrate birthdays – you know how old you are. But what if you didn’t? What if all you could go on was how you “felt”. I don’t think I look like my actual age. Sure, I’m starting to sport a little bit of gray here and there but not much. I have friends who are younger than me who are almost entirely gray. I probably don’t dress appropriately for my actual age. Plenty of shorts and flip flops. I had to break down and go buy a sport coat a few months ago for an event because I didn’t have one. Without knowing what people really think, I’d guess that on appearance alone I look maybe five years younger than I really am (maybe that’s wishful thinking).

How I feel is much different. The impedance scale I use calculates out my metabolic age based upon weight, body fat, BMI, etc… It thinks I’m four years older than I really am. Probably correct given my current conditioning. I’ve also reached an age where I have a never ending series of aches and pains. A rotating litany of things that hurt. An old shoulder injury. Legs and knees that ache from five straight days of skiing and mountain biking. A weird foot pain that won’t go away. My body certainly knows it’s not twenty any more.

Mental age… that’s hard to say. Somewhere in my late thirties maybe (again, maybe wishful thinking). I still think I can do all the physical things I used to. Perhaps most important, I still want to do all those things. I’m not quite ready to give it all up, head to back porch and just watch sunsets. Slightly contradictory, I’m also starting to feel a maturity of thought that I don’t think I had before. It’s hard to explain. While I’m not very good at expressing it, my brain seems to explore thoughts on multiple different levels unlike what it did when I was ten or more years younger (that could also be the nightly bourbon making me feel wise). I’m not as quick to jump on whatever the conventional wisdom of the day is, like when I was younger. If someone makes a claim about something, I’m much more inclined to wait and see before believing it. At the same time, I find myself having a much stronger sense of right and wrong in the things I do believe. I suspect with age comes a decreasing need to care what others think.

I don’t know. It’s an interesting thought experiment. I hope I’m one of those guys who’s still riding bikes when I’m 75. Not just for the physical component, but to still have the desire to be out there enjoying life at that age. I hope I’m still able to make a cognizant argument about some world event when I’m an old geezer and not just be a grumpy old “get off my lawn” guy.

I wonder what makes people age. Is it diet? Exercise? Mental stimulation? Are some people just born with a zest and curiosity for life that others aren’t, or is it something that you cultivate on your own? Excluding disease, is there there something I can do to hold off aging or is it just luck of the cards I was dealt?

How about you – how old do you feel if you didn’t know when you were born?

Daily Life, Diet, Health

It’s A Problem Of Volume

The numbers are just depressing. But because of those pesky laws of thermodynamics, you can’t escape them. You can’t cheat them. The numbers don’t lie. One pound is 3,500 calories. To lose one pound a week you need to create a 500 calorie deficit every day. That’s it. No more or less complicated than that. Create the deficit and you lose weight. Go over and you gain. Simple, right?

The depressing part is that we’ve lost all sense of volume. While the internet has convinced you that seed oils are the devils work, the real problem is that you and I have no real concept of how many calories we consume. Our serving sizes have become ginormous. When you see what an actual serving size is, it no longer looks like it’s enough food. I’d still be hungry if that’s all I ate!

I start every morning with the full intention of tracking exactly my caloric intake. For example, this morning I resolved to eat a much smaller breakfast than normal. I made three scrambled eggs with a little bit of cheese and some avocado. Healthy, right? When you measure out the actual amount of cheese I used and factor in the butter I put in the pan, my breakfast was 800 calories. That’s approaching almost half of my daily calorie budget to hit my calorie deficit. Like I said, depressing. Because of that breakfast volume, I can now only have a small piece of steak and some broccoli for dinner. That will give me just enough calories to include a protein shake mid-day. That sucks.

Oh sure you can buy yourself some extra calories with exercise, but not enough to make up for the volume we normally eat. A three mile walk or a strength training session in the gym burns maybe a couple hundred calories. It gets you a little room in the calorie budget, but not much.

I live in a state of perpetual food guilt. I have a constant mental running total of roughly how many calories I think I’ve eaten. I bargain with myself all day long. I’ll eat this protein bar or half cup of skinny pop popcorn now, and then I’ll eat only half the steak tonight. I’ll have a beer with dinner, and I’ll just skip breakfast tomorrow to make up for it. It’s gotten to the point that I dread the idea of going out to dinner with friends. A restaurant menu is now just a list of things I can’t eat. It’s mentally exhausting and leads to never ending cravings. I don’t know what the answer is.

That’s not true – I know what the answer is, I just can’t seem to get there. For me, it’s an issue of activity. Being busy. When I was at my thinest I worked three 12 hour shifts in a row. I chose to eat only one meal a day on workdays. It worked because as a nurse I was so busy during my shift there was no time to think about food. I left the house at 06:30 am and got home at 8:00 pm and sprinted all day. It was easy to ignore hunger. I ate a massive meal when I got home, but it was still probably only 1200 calories at most. That gave me my weekly deficit. On my off days I was crazy active and busy. Trail running and mountain biking every day. I was too busy to think about food.

Now I’m home all day and for various reasons I have not been as active. Oh sure I do an activity almost every day – skiing, a workout, or a hike with the dog. But not with the intensity I used to. And I’m left with a lot of time to think about the pantry and fridge. Wondering what I can cut out tonight so I can have a bowl of popcorn now.

So it’s clear that I have some problems to solve. The first is to get a handle on exactly how many calories I’m consuming. It’s time for at least a few weeks of weighing and measuring everything. I need to understand portion size and stop eyeballing volume. I should probably meal prep, but that just sucks. I might need to resort to a pre-made, calorie controlled meal service. Anything to keep the volume in check.

Second, and probably most important, I need to find a way to get busy again. Out of the house and away from the fridge. A day full of activities so I’m not thinking about being hungry. Truly a first world problem.

It’s crazy how powerful the food addiction is. Any addiction, I suppose. The moment you decide to tackle the problem, your brain goes into overdrive and decides to remind you all day long of the very thing you’re trying to quit. Breaking that cycle of thinking about and craving something is one of the hardest things to do mentally.

So, we’re ready to start a new week. As the old saying goes, “If it can’t be measured, it can’t be managed”. Weighing and measuring everything.

Meanwhile, I’m off to a family Sunday brunch and trying to ignore all the food. Sigh. How did we get to this point?